Monday, February 28, 2011

Its the little things.

HOLY UPDATES!

ok. next two days I may overload you. I am SORRY ahead of time.
I had a wonderful and very FULL weekend.
But with all that happened I just cant bare to wait any longer to share something so adorable.
My boyfriend just makes me little things sometimes.
Very, very cute things.
He brought me this little wooden arrow on Friday for me to make a necklace out of.
I have thousands of ideas for it but could bare to do any because I just had one.
I asked if he would make some for my handmade Etsy. I want to stain some for the natural look but also want to paint some awesome colors. I cannot wait to get started.
But for now here is my untouched prototype.

Boyfriend also decided that SO much of my happiness comes from being outside and this winter (along with life events lately) have been making me ultra sad and so we bundled up and went on a long walk and just talked. Even though the wind was freezing it was so worth it to be outside again and get some fresh air.
He is good for me.

Okay more soon. I need to start updating RIGHT when things happen so I do not fall so behind.

xoxo
jess

Friday, February 25, 2011

Gimmie Five.

Hello there!

It has been a WHIRLWIND of a few weeks, jesh!

But here are five pretties I am digging this week:

1. Loving this buttercup apron skirt!!

2. Reusable snack bags! oh. em. gee.

3. Big pretty green hair bow, yes please

4. I have a thing for felted acorns, I know I am weird. Love these colors.

5. So inspired by plants lately, getting SO excited to garden!

And there you have it!

On a happy note.. MY CAMERA IS FIXED! I know super quick right?
Well I am a lucky girl because a good friend Ryan Terry, reallllly hooked me up and was able to fix it within my budget. He has no idea how thankful I am.

Also my brother has been home for the last week and it has been great to have him, he is helping me laugh more.

I am really inspired and excited for some upcoming things even though the past few weeks really sucked. Excited to start sharing with you.

Have a wonderful night!

xoxo jess

Thursday, February 24, 2011

snail mail!

I got a package today!!!

I did, and if you know me you know snail mail makes me VERY happy. And I absolutely needed to smile today because its been quite stressful.
Little something from my Lindsey love in jersey..

sweet little card.
my own set of recipe cards (you wouldn't believe how much that really looks like my bike!)
early birthday gift:)
and BUTTON COOKIES, ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!
Also there was a little amish book on canning which I was SO excited about.

I LOVE being pen pals with Linds, we have been doing it since last spring and its just wonderful:) you can check out some yummy things she makes here.


Last night was the best night I have had in a LONG time. My face hurt from laughing so much. The sad thing is my camera took a fall and broke (which was the stress of my day today). I will post some happiness from last night once I steal some pictures:)

It's the little things that are keeping me going through these last two weeks. Thankful to be surrounded by so many wonderfuls.

xoxo
j


disclaimer: sorry for sucky photo quality gotta deal with you have to bare with me using phone photos and point and shoots for a bit:(

Monday, February 21, 2011

Ok here goes..

Last week sucked.
Are any of you the first generation college kid of your family?
I am. I am also the first generation high school graduate.
So its easy to say I feel the weight of needing to be "the successful one"
And I kind of always made it that way because in my mind being a college student working to attain a degree, having a job, having a boyfriend, having a second job, and being crafty, in some form made an equation that equalled success.
Being the eldest child in a broken home I have felt strongly that I had to be the one to hold it together. I had to carry this success on my shoulders for the sake of this family.

Last week I went to visit with my advisor to plan out my up coming semesters.
I ended up getting a surprise I really didn't want at all.
He looked at me and simply said.. "It shows you are not enrolled this semester"
My heart started beating really fast "but, but I have been going to class for three weeks now, thats impossible" I could feel my eyes grow heavy as the tears began to well up.
He explained that I hadn't registered my classes correctly online so I was not really a currently enrolled student.
Oh my gosh. I could feel my body begin to go into panic.
I messed up.
I failed.

My whole body tensed as we talked about all my options. Unfortunately, none of them were very good. I had just missed the late add/drop deadline so if I wanted to try and get back in my classes it would be roughly 600 dollars per class and I would receive no financial aid.

When I left I felt as though my heart had fell from my chest and was now being dragged behind me on a string as I sluggishly walked back to my car.
Only to find my meter had ran out and a 25 dollar ticket was awaiting me.
I got inside my car and all I could do was scream before I instantly burst into tears.
I felt as though I ruined everything I had been working for my "plan" was now offset.
How do I get back up?
I assumed this was just my fate, failing, messing up the plan.
Fear of never getting where I truly want to be in life, fear of never succeeding.

And then I heard a series of words from some wonderfully wise women in my life that changed everything..
"who cares?"
"who ever said life was going to be easy"
"you are in a house of educators we're not letting you give up"
"I'm going with you to fix it, I want to be there for you"
and my favorite...
"you are disappointing no one"

I am not? But the plan, the timeline, how can I stray from that and still come out on top?
The next day when I woke up it was very sunny. And I felt some weird sense of relief.
That I was not alone.
That I messed up and it was okay.
That success isn't going to look like I think it should.
That "the plan" is totally out of my hands.
So this semester I am going back to work. This summer I will be making up my whole semester missed. And after that I will be walking slowly through the rain and continually waiting for the days of sun (and I will enjoy each one!). I cannot say I will never plan, because its human to want to. I can just say for now I am resting in failure, realizing its okay.

Thank you blog world for sharing in my failure. I love you for always being here.

xoxo j


Maybe I needed some time to be reminded for myself.

I am so blessed.
I do know this, but sometimes I forget.
Sometimes I am so hurt by the world, and defeated, and lost that I feel I might not ever be able to pull myself out again.
In those times, I am reminded I do not have to. I do not have to be alone and pull myself out.
Nowadays when I start to hermit and turn into the introverted version of myself some little slice of love is sent my way to remind me how much people mean to me, and also that I matter to people.
This is not something I easily can say, and something I have even a harder time writing because then it is real, it is permanent. And I must actually believe it in some shape or form to actually put it into words.

This weekend Greg brought me this little package from school.
I had no idea what it was but he told me it was from Rachel (a friend from school) and I immediately got giddy before even knowing its contents because anything she touches basically turns into something beautiful.
Before I show you the inside of this package I need to explain something to you. If you do not already know I absolute obsession with vintage pyrex you will not really understand the greatness of this gift, really. I am a obsessing collector as is my father. We call each other when we find the rare patterns and both sell the pieces we can live without. (He is much better at that than I am) I love all my pieces.

ANYWAY, I opened the package and found this..
This amazing girl took a bunch of pyrex patterns and arranged them into a new pattern on the computer than hand screen printed me my own stationary.


It took everything in my body to hold back my tears. It was so incredibly thoughtful. And I knew the time it took to do all of it, to make the pattern, mix the inks, and print all the paper. I was overcome with joy and blessing. That someone would take the time out of their busy life for me,
just because.
People are really great.

So to Miss Rachel Preville. A beautiful soul, a magnificant artist, and friend.
You make my heart so happy.

After a hard week it was just what I needed. I am trying to push through all the muck.
I got through this weekend because my brother is home from the army making me laugh non stop and my boyfriend is the most incredibly supportive boyfriend ever. He is constantly reminding me that its okay to mess up and even to fail, that I put too much pressure on myself and I need to throw timelines and plans out the window sometimes. That's how life is really going to happen.

more soon promise.
xoxo,
j


Sunday, February 20, 2011

New Recipe: week five.

Ok so I am SUPER late on this. It was supposed to be last weeks, and then I should have a new one today. Yikes, I'm behind!

As I have mentioned in previous posts my heart is all over the U.S. and because of my undeniable love for Valentines day I baked some cookies to send to some of my loves far away.

This week: Sugar Cookies.
I thought it was surprising how quick they were to make and was happy I still had so much of my day to do other things.. was I wrong.
While the cookies are very quick to make I didnt realize how long it takes to sit down and frost 3 dozen cookies alone. haha!

I forgot to take pictures of them completely finished, but I iced them with homemade icing in various shades of red and pink. They looked super cute.

Thank you for baring with me as I play catch up, I promise for a "real" post later today.

xoxo jess

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Friday Faves.

I'm sorry my posting was low this week I have about 20 to catch up on so I hope that happens this weekend. I had a rough week that I will share when I am ready.

This week I was absolutely drawn to pretty colors and pretty pattens..

1. everything about this little lunch bag I am in love with

2. this is the prettiest bowl ever.

3. I would love to have all fabric storage boxes!

4. these little houses make my heart leap

5. and lastly this is to me wishing for spring

So many pretty things out there. I love to Etsy window shop:)
Lots more updates coming, sorry again for the lack of being here this week.
xoxo jess

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Treasuresss!

I have the COOLEST grandparents.

Last night I was in the basement digging through my papas toolbox.
(I needed pilers to make some hooks for my space)

I saw something really dusted on the tool bench and had to do a double take.
I RAN upstairs dusted them off and there they were, amazingly awesome vintage glasses.
I have been looking for a pair for a few years now and could never find them for under $25 and with the recent popularity of large frames it is hard to find them under $60.

I was nervous for Nan to get home because I really wanted them but I worried they had some sentimental value or something.

She got home and I ran downstairs and rushed through my words as always ending with,
"I just reallllly love them!"
She laughed at me (as usual) and said "I dont care" directly followed by:
"if we knew you were going to be so weird we would have saved a lot more things"
HAHA! Man, I stinking love her.
So now I have super cool new glasses and I am MOST excited:)

xoxo j

There is magic in the walls.

This is the brown house.

This is where I got to run away to for a few days and really rest my soul.
When I walked in for the first time, I was overwhelmed with the feeling of home.
I felt as though I had stayed there so many times, as if these girls were old friends whom I was already very acquainted with.
And though that is not the case I cannot deny the immediate calmness that overcame me and I wandered through the house.
Let me tell you the house is absolutely magical, filled with little nooks and crannies that make it this warm solid community space.

And though the house itself is filled with so much character is it is nothing compared to its inhabitants.
Ten girls.
Ten wonderful beautiful girls. So much of why they are so magical is because they have no idea how truly great they are.
They are my kind of people. And I'm not even sure what that means but its just how I felt. People who know how to love simply. People who give you hugs like they've known you your whole life. People willing to cuddle with you. People willing to laugh who knows the hour. People who truly want to hear what each other has to say. People who can sit in the same room and say nothing. People understand beautiful things. Just good people.

I got right into the swing of the house and felt as though it was my own. I noticed myself doing silly little things as if I were staying long term.

When Sunday came I had tears. I SERIOUSLY did not want to go home. It took all my being not to run away and move in. I hadn't felt that safe in a long time.

A lot of Monday was spent wishing I was I was there.
Here's some of the happiness..
the most delicious coffee.
handmade aprons with name tags.. ekk!
drying tea bags to be made into paper.
beautiful art created by those who live there.
pretty hair that Sally did for me!
happy porch I cannot wait to sit on when the sun returns.
purchases from the amish store. most amazing place ever.
happy hallways.
and adorable mini cupcakes.
Thank you my dear girls for opening your home to me with so much genuine love. I cannot wait for another visit.

xoxo,
jess

Monday, February 14, 2011

All you need is love.


I hope everyone is feeling massive amounts of love and appreciation today!
My whole day was rather happy..
This morning I got to nannying early so I could make them heart shaped french toast with heart shaped strawberries. They thought it was rather yummy.
They had all made me the cutest valentines that just warmed me up.
We listened to happy music, danced and then I got them onto the bus.

I went over to Jane and Mark's house to spend some time with the pregnant mama and little tikes.
Let me just tell you she's wonderful.
She made me coffee and the happiest valentine muffins, delish!
I love sharing and chatting about everything under the sun. I am honored to seek wisdom from such a lovely woman.
Then the four of us did a valentines day craft, IT WAS SO CUTE. I might share it on the blog when I have time because it is really adorable.
Then I came home to finish up my own valentines and just spend the day cleaning my space
(I am almost ready to share photos of my progress!)

My sweet boyfriend may be far but always thinking of me. We are having a handmade holiday because we are both broke college kids again. He made me this darling wooden bird ring, I pretty much love it.
I wear pins almost everyday, so he also made me this sweet bottle cap button.
I am crazy about him.

(I cannot show you his gift yet because I am waiting until this weekend to give it!)

This weekend probably brought my soul more rest than I have had in a long time. I cannot wait to share it with you, that and much much more! I'm so behind on blogs!

extra xoxoxoxooxoxoxo today,
jess