Friday, March 25, 2011

Don't carry the world upon your shoulders.


My baby brother
The one with cow-licked hair
The motor headed geek,
That I grew up with.

The defender of our childhood,
That disappeared with our parents bad decisions.
The strength in our bond led us out
With arms raised up, for victory was ours.

Now he raises up a gun
To defend a country
In a war I do not understand.
Over the greeny blue field
into the heat of some sand grain obis.

My baby brother,
I guess isn't so small anymore.

But I still envision him with that smile in which no one could resist
Helping match his clothes, and snuggling him to sleep.
But as I sat across from the small boy in my mind
Who told me he signed the paper
His eyes dimmed
The mirror was cleaned, and revealed a man.

And now I am scared.
I am scared I cannot defend him anymore
I am scared of who he will become
I am scared he will not come home, and walk me down the aisle as he always promised.

My friend, my rock, my baby brother.
I love you to the moon and back,
I love you forever ever and a day,
I love you a bushel and a peck.
Though I know love will not protect you
I hope you keep it in your pocket,
And pray it may be a small warmth for your cold nights alone,
On your quest to adulthood and self discovery.

And just know I will be waiting for you with yellow ribbons and open arms,
When you get home.
All my love and support Joshua.

xo sissy.

dear blog world,
I have begun the "falling apart stage" of my brother leaving, so thank you for baring with me as I get this out. Your prayers for him are greatly appreciated. We have quite a road ahead of us.
Hopefully a craft post this afternoon? Something upbeat?
xox j

2 comments:

  1. beautiful jess. we'll all be here for everything.

    rachel

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  2. all my thoughts and prayers to you and josh. love you both. he's making us all so proud.

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